Stop. Breathe. Enjoy.

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Crimbo

I just finished reading a fellow bloggers post about "crimbo", that limbo time between Christmas and New Years. I don't know that I've ever hear it described better. I feel like I'm waiting for the New Years...then it'll all finally be over and I can de-decorate my house and get back to normal.

I'm finding myself annoyed at the decorations I have up. It's not Christmas. It's done. I'm ready to take what few I did put up down. Maybe it's the cramped feeling I have in my living room with the 8ft tree, or maybe it's the feeling of a lack of order.

Don't get me wrong I LOVE decorations, but I decorate November 11th...sometimes even earlier. I find that I love the anticipation of christmas all the more and once it's done, so am I.

I feel like I'm in limbo these days. Nothing seems quite right...like I'm a puzzle piece that's in place but when you really look at it you realize it just doesn't quite fit.

I'm crabby and short fused almost all the time...winter blues? I hope not...we haven't even hit the coldest part...there's still 2 months of arctic weather to endure. And I'm the genius who'd running a half marathon in it.

It could be the tendon strain in my right arm, that's making typing this utter agony...I've given up my ipod and computer work for the holidays to let it heal. Could it be I feel my age for the first time in my life?

I'm approaching 37 this upcoming year and I've suddenly had the realization that I'm not 20 anymore. My body hurts. In part from the strain I put it under running, maybe it's not that I'm getting older, but more the realization that I'm not indestructible.

Sleeping has become and adventure in finding just that right spot so nothing hurts...so far no luck.

I remember a time when I could eat what I want and there were no consequences. There was no monitoring levels of wheat/gluten/dairy/alcohol or refined sugars. I ate and loved it. Now I still love what I eat, I just have to be sooooo careful or I get sick.

So my question is; what is it about crimbo that makes me focus on the bad instead of the good?

I can always find something good about my life...it's a great life! So why do I feel like the muppet musicians of Bremmen Town? I believe it was Catgut that whined "I'm old, I'm beat up, I'm worn away and just throwed out".

Today I feel one with Catgut.

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